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Making my boss’s character defects my resentment

created by: MC75 3 years, 9 months ago



I’ve been thinking a bit about Saturdays message of the day, because since February I have been working in a challenging environment where I feel like my only purpose at work is to listen to my boss talk (and often the things he says are sexist and racist). On some days, I even find my resentment growing because I end up thinking about where I was (in a successful job where I was at the top of the hierarchy and could set the tone) to where I am today after hitting rock bottom. On some days it is easier to surrender my resentments toward my boss and toward myself than on other days.

One of my old employers was famous for saying “it is what it is”—sort of a shortened form of the first line of the Serenity Prayer. I need to keep that in mind on those days when letting go is more challenging. I like the daily message’s suggestion of taking time to meditate during my work day.


by: MC75 3 years, 9 months ago
replying to MC75

please try to remember that you are not such a special snow flake. Your boss reminds me of mine, and additionally, I have elderly parents who are racist and probably don't even understand that. I have to remember that I still love them and want to be a helpful son...that I have this cause...and that I don't have to let their values alter mine and I can be a good son anyway ad that my opinions aren't going to change their beliefs anyway. it is hard though to exercise self restraint around them but I've found that when I express my opinions it just makes my job of being a good son harder. tricky stuff. At the end of the day, I need to keep my sobriety as the most important thing and to be arguing with them about politics and social justice only stresses me out and them out and nothing more.


by: anonymous 3 years, 9 months ago
replying to MC75

We all have to eat shit. I am the CEO of a company and I have to put up with others all the time. It doesn't matter who you are or what your status is, in one shape or another, we must put up with others. The serenity threatening piece arises from our own narcsicism and desire to be in control. Focus on changing that, not others. I'm sure that you had problems to deal with even at your old job where you thought you were in charge. don't let your relationship with current boss warp your view of reality.


by: anonymous 3 years, 9 months ago
replying to MC75

tough deck of cards to have drawn. this too shall pass and you will escape the toxic boss


by: JuliaSeeker 3 years, 9 months ago

I can't change them, I must accept them and the situation. Stay sober and this too shall pass. Look at the boss as a way to develop patience. You need the money so you have to do what you need to. Patience. You are doing great.


by: anonymous 3 years, 9 months ago