Today marks 3 weeks AF. Yesterday I had a get together and I feel like I'm like zero fun, and just not myself. it's a foreign feeling and quite honestly freaking me completely out. So today I have been tossing around the idea of occasional drinking. I realize that's a slippery slope and I am probably just over thinking, but even my significant other asked me if we could ever just enjoy a drink together once in a while and I wasnt sure how to respond. I just dont know!!
Well done for getting this far, keep going, I'm on day 93 and still struggle with this feeling, but I have socialised with drinking friends and find that actually I am fun. Alcohol gives you a false sense of what is fun. I can still interact, laugh, dance and sometimes just be silly, make people laugh too. Don't be too hard on yourself, feeling comfortable in this situation comes with time. I used to get aggravated, panicky and overwhelmed. My husband still drinks a few beers a day, so on the odd occasion I still want to invite friends over and go to the bar/ restaurant, where people will be consuming alcohol. I feel awakened, not numb, I wake up hangover free, they don't, they are stuck in a cycle. I really resonate with what you are feeling right now. But I consciously remember, what made me decide to give up alcohol on the first place, the horrendous feeling of regret, not remembering when I was abusive, terrible hangovers, waking up wanting another drink, a vicious cycle of bad behaviour. And this keeps me from picking up the first drink. You're not alone in this, even though it feels as though you are. Stay strong and keep going 💪. The positives of being sober far outway the negatives of being drunk.
Have you read the book by Annie Grace, This Naked Mind. it helps put not drinking and socializing into perspective. It is a hard decision, that I have also been struggling with. I went back to thinking I could drink occasionally after 22days AF and found that I quickly feel right back into my old ways that made me feel like a horrible person who I hated. I still haven't figured this whole thing out but I'm working on it. Let me know what you decide and good luck
I would love to eventually be able to have a few drinks with friends every now and again.
We have to remember that staying sober is more important than getting drunk with old friends. Stay sober one day at a time. Real friends will like you even if you aren’t drinking. Think of the times you alienated friends because you drank too much. I’ve got plenty of those memories. My relationships are so much better now that I am sober. I also like my sober friends I have found at AA meetings.
Once you are a pickle, you’ll never be a cucumber again. It’s all or nothing with sobriety. You may start out drinking again like “normal” folks but eventually you’ll be headed down the path of self destruction and sometimes it kills us.
I've read the book and it helped me tremendously. However, I am still struggling with that feeling. And these are my kids, and they arent boring lol. I dont know what I was expecting really.
from my own experience i found out who my true friends were when i sobered up cause the ones that stayed close to me and helped me out with 2 am phone calls and just listen to me bable about nothing thise are my true friends and the ones that just used me for my money and free booze have moved on its funny how getting sober weeds out the bad and good friends and the more you go to meeting and hang around like minded people the more true friends you will make that will stand by you threw thick and thin and when you get a sponcer dont forget to call them when things are also going good nit just when things are bad
thier is no ever drinking like a social person we have a allergie and i speak for my self that if i drink once i might get away with it but wont last long before i am looking up and wondering what happen its a hard concept to grab at first but for me once i cam to terms with that drinking is my problem and not anybody eles problem life became easier and people around you will work with you as time goes on and its a ruff transision from drinking every day to not at all it becomes easier with time
Thanks Andrewanderson. I agree totally.
im only 253 days sober. but one thing i have found that it is taking a long time to find the real me. the me without drinking. the best thing that has worked for me is to stay sober, and read books and keep trying to better myself. the more i do that, the better i have become mentally.
Finding the real me is a lifelong process, if it is at all possible. I seem to perceive myself in relation to others especially attachments. I have learned to stop comparing, that I am individual but not terminally unique. Being sober gives me a chance to get to know myself.
ONLY 253? Are you kidding? That’s huge! It probably feels like a lifetime. Congratulations!