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Trying. First day clean

created by: GabrielBR 5 months, 1 week ago

The first day clean is too hard. I want to stop using, But my mind and my body, ask for crack/cocaine.
I work, i have my own company, so i cannot take a nap or go surf when i think about drug.
And has a lack of money this month that was killing myself. I have bill’s to pay and the sales was to bad this month on my company.
Now i’m wanting to close my store and go buy some shit and smoke till i sleep and wake
Tomorrow. This way i stop thinking about my problems, but i know that tomorrow will be the same. So i’m trying to stay clean, i want to, but is too hard.
I already try therapy but for me doesn’t work too much and i spend a lot of money on it.
Now i’m 19 hours clean, but i guess i wont can finish this day without using. I will try, but my mind and body is more strong than my wish.
I will keep trying. Someday i achieve my goal to stay clean for a large time or forever,
Which is a bit impossible to me.
I do t expected andwers and help here. Im writing here just for help my mind to talk.
Sorry my english. Im from florianopolis brazil and i dont study english.

by: GabrielBR 5 months, 1 week ago
replying to GabrielBR

Go to a Narcotics Anonymous meeting or an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting.

by: Clean 5 months, 1 week ago
replying to Clean

Ihi. Thanks for the supprt.
I us to go to anonimois narcotics, but since i cant stay clean for a few days, when im talking and telling that im 1 day sober, and the next week i tell that i 2 days sober. The people of NA look at me with a judge look. I dont fell confortable in NA. So i stop going.
Im an strong addict. In this moment i cant stop using, but i wont giveup. Anyway. Thank you for the replies, i will keep writing to see if it will help me.
See you

by: GabrielBR 5 months, 1 week ago
replying to GabrielBR

try different meetings. can u try treatment?

by: Grateful 5 months, 1 week ago