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Should I start over?

created by: GabeSue 2 years, 9 months ago



here is the explanation....
I have been sober for 10 months now and I went out to a end of school staff excursion. While there, I told the place to give me a NA beer which the waitress gave off 2-3 names. I recognized 2 but not the 3rd. I told her I would try that 3rd after she explained its flavor. I had a few and was loving it. It wasn't until I got in my car and my ignition interlock said I "failed". I searched up the "NA beer" she gave me to find out it was just a "light beer with 4.2%". I am frustrated but also disappointed in myself.
I didn't know about the beer as she put it in her NA category. I had been doing so wonderful, do I need to count this against me and start over? 😩


by: GabeSue 2 years, 9 months ago
replying to GabeSue

4.2% is unfortunately not a light beer, it’s even above the mid strength level. You most definitely would have noticed after half of the first one that it contained alcohol. I believe even though it wasn’t your fault because you had more then one, you need to start your count again. However if that would make you drink again then by all means don’t restart the count. It’s one day at a time as long as your sober for each and every 24hrs from here on that’s all that matters. Hope this doesn’t confuse you.
Ps only you truly know what happened and why you drank more then 1


by: Kingy 2 years, 9 months ago
replying to GabeSue

Only you can decide if you need to start over.

We are alcoholics. Did you ever drink beer for the taste? Why start now?


by: rick0531 2 years, 9 months ago

no dont blame yourself.i would write a complaint to the place that served you this beer.if you can i would just stay away from any drink that relates to booze at all,just stick to soft drinks,juices etc.


by: Bubbles 2 years, 9 months ago

THANK you both so much for your thoughts. I do feel a bit better this morning after sitting with my feeling overnight. I sincerely DID NOT know or "feel" intoxicated. Yes I am disappointed in myself for not noticing it, but like I have explained to people I don't know the feeling of being a little intoxicated, that's why I used to drink sooo much.
I was having this internal conversation of 'you should of noticed when a,b,c' but then my rebuttal would be 'but we all felt a,b,c because we all were enjoying ourself'.
I truly don't want to start my count over just because it was an honest mistake on my part and that's how I'm an frustrated with the waitress having to know their own menu.
Like one of you stated, I will stay away from anything that reminds me of an alcoholic drink for awhile. Luckily I don't go out very often, I am working my ass off this summer. Thank you both again 👍🏻


by: GabeSue 2 years, 9 months ago

I'm with Bubbles. That's dangerous of the restaurant. I take antabuse and I would have been barfing among other things if I was given that.
Don't you dare start over. Your intention was to drink NA beverages. You didn't choose to drink alcohol. You're doing great, keep going. I'm almost at 7 months myself:)


by: PotatoPancake 2 years, 9 months ago
replying to PotatoPancake

Thank you! I just noticed your response after I wrote my larger thank you. 🙌🏻 I do feel better once I sat with my emotions over night. Thank you again for the support and helping guide me.


by: GabeSue 2 years, 9 months ago

NA beer is dangerous in and of itself. Like going to the ballpark when there's no game.Many eventually get cravings for the game.


by: Grateful 2 years, 9 months ago
replying to Grateful

Agreed. I wouldn’t shoot up water or snort sugar to fit in. It’s really no different. Keep going to the barber shop, you’ll get your hair cut. If you feel like you have to drink around a group of people, find new friends.


by: anonymous 2 years, 9 months ago
replying to anonymous

Amen!! Great words


by: Kingy 2 years, 9 months ago

Firstly, please do not beat yourself up over this. It was absolutely not your fault. While yes, you definitely should have been able to notice, I do kind of get it. If you were surrounded by people and noise you could have just been happy and already a little anxious due to a crowd so not have put 2+2 together. I wouldn’t start over, no. You weren’t “drunk” and it was a complete mistake and not your fault. HOWEVER, please please call and speak to the owner/manager and tell them what happened. If someone with an allergy or on certain meds had been given the same beer while asking for a NA one, disaster could have happened. Unacceptable. Chin up, and good for you for your sobriety!!


by: PuzzleMom 2 years, 9 months ago
replying to PuzzleMom

Puzzle Mom: Thank you so much. Sincerely thank you. Yes I didn't feel drunk or anything, just enjoying the summer, last day of "work" as a teacher, and reminiscing on memories.
just yes right away when my interlock failed me, I felt so horrible and continued to feel horrible all night. It took me over 1.5 hours (which I knows doesn't seem long, but I was in a part of town I wasn't sure about it was late) to 'come down' to be clear in the interlock. Then I remembered my '90 day letter' or not failing or my last 90 days gets extended. So it seems like I will be on it for one more month which I know isnt that bad, just felt so horrible in the moment and last night .

Definitely waking up this morning I felt better, a little shitty headache as my body hadn't had any form of liquor in 10 months, but better. I completely accepted it as the fact that it was a complete mistake and how I shouldn't be frustrated with myself I need to be frustrated with the facility and the waitress. after reading other comments I think I really will call the facility up and discuss the matter and making sure the clarification of NA versus light when you're having a waitress know the menu. cuz exactly what you and another person said about meds, allergies, and etc. I'm just very happy no one in this forum has criticized me for the mistake and has supported me in making me feel better. So I think everyone who has commented ❤️


by: GabeSue 2 years, 9 months ago
replying to GabeSue

I just want to say that we r here to support and help u in any way possible. We aren’t here to criticize u or make u feel bad and if anyone does do that, then they need to stop commenting and work on their own program of recovery! Keep ur head up and keep on keepin on! Much love!


by: hhawkins4229 2 years, 9 months ago
replying to hhawkins4229

Well said Hawko


by: Kingy 2 years, 9 months ago

It’s not your fault. I would definitely start again. I personally think you will be fine, because you did not intentionally go out and relapse. You have got this. Stay strong


by: Marissa 2 years, 9 months ago

No judgement here. A slight slip. Today is a new day. Chalk it up as a learning experience. I've had the same thing happen to me. Don't beat yourself up or the beating will win. Day 1 sounds good. You got this.


by: kkdad 2 years, 9 months ago

Thank you everyone for you insight. I decided the next day I wasn't going to "start over" as it was a mistake and not of my fault. The waitress or bartender clearing did not know their menu. After sitting with my emotions and getting a while nights of sleep, I felt more 'okay' with the situation and chalked up as a mistake on all of our parts, more on some than myself. I will not start over has it was not my intention at all, I came into the night just enjoying my last night as official work colleagues.

To clarify: I didn't have to urge or pressure to drink alcohol around my colleagues, I just do like a NA beer or cocktail sometimes. I used to drink before for the "flavor". I actually opened up about it all that night about my sobriety and how I want to continue for the long run.

Only downside is because I "failed" my interlock during my last 90 days, I will have to keep it in my car longer than the original timeline. Luckily I did the math, it would out be around an extra month.

So again thank you all, though some were more harsh than others, but thank you. You all also helped me cope with the situation and how to process my feelings. Thank you for so much support! I am glad we can all just be open and be there for one another. ❤️


by: GabeSue 2 years, 9 months ago