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Anyone else feel good right away?

created by: Shazza 1 week ago

Sorry guys. still trying to figure out this app. Day 4 today.
This is the longest I've gone without a drink for years..
I drank every day and at times to excess.. but I didn't drink 20 Oz a day or anything.
My husband admitted to be on Friday night that he addicted to cocaine..He smoked weed all day long and took edibles as well. Covid has not been kind to him.
I'm hurt and I feel stupid for not knowing that he was doing it. Especially since a similar thing happened with a bf when I was young, and then to my son when he was older.
But we've talked. A lot. We are both on Day 4 with no booze, no weed... and obviously nothing else.
From the first day clean, I have felt great. We've always had a lot of booze in the house (we're Jack Daniels collectors) but I seriously don't care. I know it will be harder out with friends but has anyone else found it remarkably great from a couple days in?
I'll admit, being sober on the weekend was weird... and I found myself feeling like I should be mixing a Caesar. But I truly realized in my head that it was a habit and not a craving.
My husband had some trouble sleeping the first couple nights, which I would assume is to be expected. So I left him to sleep in and the next morning we had breakfast together.
I feel optimistic but I'm wondering if we're fooling ourselves that we can actually kick this thing? Or are we just motivated?
We both are going to start counseling programs as my belief is that the addictions are a bandage for a bigger problem. I'm actually excited for that as we've buried 20 people in our first 6 years of marriage. I need to talk to someone and deal with my grief.
I'm sorry I'm rambling and I promise to figure this app out so I don't post like a goof anymore.
Love some feedback from you all. thanks

by: Shazza 1 week ago

Please don't apologize for posting!
I have some experience with quitting with my partner. I was able to maintain sobriety and stay clean but he did not. He did, however, continue to try and he's gotten better. I went to AA meetings and did my work, and after two years of sobriety I joined the Al-Anon program and that's where I found most of my relief. By putting the focus on myself instead of my husband, I was able to improve my quality of life, which is really what I needed to feel free. I've found that I can be happy regardless of what he's doing, sober or not. I grew up around addicts and alcoholics, Al-Anon helped tremendously with that as well. I don't think anyone just starts feeling a continuous amount of "good", we get better day by day and it gets easier. Life has it's ups and downs. When I came into the rooms, I definitely felt better than I had been when I was using or drinking. I found some hope and took it from there. If I could offer any suggestions, it would be to get yourself into a program where you can find lots of support. Al-Anon would probably be a good idea as well. I wish I had found it sooner, but they say you come in at exactly when you're supposed to. I hope this helps!

by: Inubyte 1 week ago
replying to Inubyte

Thank you Inubyte. I went downstairs tonight and he was high. So much for a great start..

by: Shazza 1 week ago

Yes as soon as I realized that I'm in control of my life not a drug. I was overwhelmed with a feeling of peace and it feels amazing.

by: Nikkikane 1 week ago
replying to Nikkikane

Thanks Nikki. I guess I'm alone in feeling great about my progress..

by: Shazza 1 week ago
replying to Shazza

It's commonly referred as the pink cloud . It's great you are feeling positive and are experiencing a new outlook on life but as with all thoughts and feelings they will pass.
Focus on your own recovery one day at a time.

by: AussieDrunk 6 days, 22 hours ago
replying to Nikkikane

Thank you Nikkikane. I was feeling a little ego creeping in. I wondered if anyone else felt the same.

by: Shazza 5 days, 12 hours ago

Thanks Aussie. Appreciate the support. The pink didn't last long.

by: Shazza 6 days, 16 hours ago

You can do it. I've found, in my experience, that having any type of expectations for "kicking this thing" for good in early recovery is a setup to a downfall. I'm not trying to be negative, just relating what happened with me. My advice would be to take it day by day, hour by hour. I'm (we) are all very proud of you for taking the steps toward a better life, and I wish you all the best!

by: TheOptimusRuss 6 days, 16 hours ago
replying to TheOptimusRuss

Thanks Optimist Russ.

I'm only on day 5 and likely still fooling myself in honing that someday I will be able to have a cocktail because I enjoy the flavor and not drink vodka/Coke like it's my day job.
If that time would be lovely. But if it doesn't, I need to be ok with knowing that I can't .
For now the pressure that I put on. myself looking at "maybe" or "I hope" makes it more difficult right now.
So I'm concentrating on not only my physical health, but my mental health and going day by day.

by: Shazza 5 days, 13 hours ago

you can do this,might feel hard at first but if you and your partner rely on each other you might gain more strengh working as a team.also try to talk and connect to other people if you ever become overwhelmed

by: Bubbles 6 days, 14 hours ago
replying to Bubbles

Thanks Bubbles... that's great advice. I am certainly starting to see how difficult it would be for one spouse to stop an addictive behavior without the other doing the same. I know that they say you have to do it for you. Which I also believe. I can't help but feel like, it would great diminish the chances of success.

by: Shazza 5 days, 12 hours ago

Hey Shazza, he may not get it right away but YOU can. I know it's super frustrating and hurtful, just try and remember he is one of us and he is sick too. Detach with love and take good care of yourself. 🤗 Surround yourself with those that have been through it! I know it got really lonely for me when it felt like I was the only one doing the work. Being around others that had the same goal as me was a life saver.

by: Inubyte 6 days, 5 hours ago
replying to Inubyte

Thanks Inubyte. I'm really trying to do that. I can't say that I know people who have been through it. But I am signed on to speak with a coach this morning who absolutely has been. and she's inspiring, brilliant and a recovering alcoholic. I KNOW she's living her best life so I'm hoping she will take me on as a client. And I'm sure that vi can get my life back on track.
My husband is not staying in the same room with me. I'm very angry. And I need to with in that before I can share intimate space with him again. But he's also made appointments with both an addictions counselor and a coach.
We love each other. And I'm hopeful we can get back on track .

by: Shazza 5 days, 12 hours ago
replying to Shazza

Good for you for setting boundaries! Everything sounds very hopeful, I'm glad to hear you are both taking steps forward.

by: Inubyte 3 days, 23 hours ago