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i can honestly say ive been hard man

created by: Max530 2 weeks, 1 day ago

I haven't drank but God, I get i fucked up with my huge mistake, that im hugely guilty and regretful for, trust me im living with it...but why..why did it have to get thrown in my face today in an argument...

by: Max530 2 weeks, 1 day ago
replying to Max530

Good for you for not drinking! Your bad feeling will pass. Let go of beating yourself up over your mistake. We can't change the past but don't have to recreate it by drinking over it. Think of three things you are grateful for and this will help.

by: Grateful 2 weeks, 1 day ago
replying to Grateful

thank you!

by: Max530 2 weeks, 1 day ago
replying to Max530

Aw geez. I'm assuming you're talking about your partner. My husband and I are recovering addicts and I got sober first. I threw his relapses and stuff up in his face a lot, and it was all out of fear and feeling the need to control so that he wouldn't use again. Just keep showing up and staying sober. You may direct whoever it is you're talking about to the program of Al-Anon- I found much relief there and don't do that kinda stuff now. The chapter to The Wives in the Big Book has a lot of good stuff in it as well. You may also sit down with them and just tell them how you feel when you get into an argument and this happens. Alcoholism is a family disease- our loved ones are affected by it, too. Love, patience and understanding will go a long way with them.

by: Inubyte 2 weeks, 1 day ago
replying to Inubyte

I appreciate it...I guess I just find it hard to bring up my feelings I think at this point they don't matter due to my mistakes and while drinking not taking into account other peoples feelings. I know we all deal with our own things..and it really is something that affects a whole family..I just don't feel like anything im doing is going to prove I am making a big change.. and yeah I am and should be held accountable for my past actions...but unfortunately I can't change them, even though I wish I could...and thats a hard pill tonswallow...but when its thrown in my face and brought up...its like nothing I've been doing matters and there will always be THIS to hold above me...if that makes the easy thing to just bust out when someone's upset with me...because honestly I did just shut right down and stop speaking.

by: Max530 2 weeks, 1 day ago
replying to Max530

Something that helped me in my own journey of sobriety was telling myself that other people's opinions of me don't matter unless I'm seeking guidance from them. When it comes down to it, only God's opinion matters and as long as I'm seeking His will and doing the best I can, it's enough for now. God will show me when it's time to make a change. Not sure if you're religious, my concept of God came from the help of AA so you can use Highest Power if you need... it's just what helped me.

by: Inubyte 2 weeks ago

Keep going and try to forgive yourself. Try to give a hug to yourself. After all, we're all doing the best that we can. Sometimes people try to deliberately hurt us, especially if it's someone close to you like family, they just know where to stab, almost. But sometimes words are designed to hurt you, but just know that when someone is trying to do that, it has nothing to do with you but them. Hurt people hurt. I hope they will have more love and patience for you in the future. You're doing great and keep going! 🙌

by: gothdetective 1 week, 6 days ago