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Is being sober in today’s society REALISTIC????

created by: DoraG 4 months, 1 week ago

Earlier this year I went through something with my work. I ended in the ER after attempting to end my life. It was the most darkest moment I have experienced in my entire existence.
I started drinking in my early twenties and gained so much weight and started hating myself. This year was the pivotal moment for me. I stopped drinking cold turkey. So far the cravings are the worse. I pass by so many liquor stores and it’s hard. Then co workers go out after a hard day’s work and I wonder why am I even trying, going against the grain in this society that causes so much stress and depression. I don’t know if I have in me to keep going. Then when I ponder going back to drinking I want to end my life again. I don’t feel like it’s worth it to be alive, certainly not in this work.

by: DoraG 4 months, 1 week ago
replying to DoraG

Hi so sorry to hear you are so low but you’re still here so that’s a huge achievement. Alcohol is legalised poison makes us more depressed when we are low and fucks us up physically too . Cravings are the worst but I’ve found drinking zero alcohol drinks helps me in social situations and when I NEED that glass of wine. Try some maybe ? Be kind to yourself , one day at a time 😊

by: Dotty 4 months, 1 week ago
replying to Dotty

Which types are zero alcohol? I don’t think I’ve ever seen them?? Thank you thought for your encouragement

by: DoraG 4 months, 1 week ago
replying to DoraG

I live in UK lots of shops/ supermarkets sell zero alcohol, beer , cider , spirits and wine . You can also get online, try googling ?

by: Dotty 4 months, 1 week ago
replying to DoraG

Dora, honestly dear if I didnt have a group of like minded individuals to support me I would feel like you. I need daily connection with fellow recovering alcoholic/addicts. We can share our feelings and often we laugh at how crazy we are. Over the years of my joyous sobriety, I have made deep lasting real friends rather than dope dependent parasites and drinking buddies. How can you connect daily with others who are in recovery?

by: Grateful 4 months, 1 week ago
replying to Grateful

I live in Colorado so everyone if either always high or always drunk. I thought about attending some of the AA meetings, but when I think of the stigma of being labeled an alcoholic, I cringe then convince myself that I don’t have a problem. I’m still in the denial phase I guess. I live alone and don’t have many friends, so the isolation also doesn’t help

by: DoraG 4 months, 1 week ago
replying to DoraG

I just got out of an AA meeting. Feel great... I'm not going to tell you what to do, but I will tell you that you might be surprised at how happy joyous and free a lot of the folks there are.

by: Grateful 4 months, 1 week ago
replying to DoraG

hey! Glad you reached out, I live in the CO area as well. BUT I can assure you if you think the people there only drink or get high, you’re around the wrong crowd. BUT I also had the same thought that there is no possible way to go to bars with friends and not drink. However, I tried it, Diet Coke and sparkling water with cranberry were my go to’s and here I am 8 weeks sober and go out almost every weekend. Non alcoholic drinks at bars is one of those things you think will never work until you simply just try it, it’s become the norm for me now and I cherish my time at the bar not to get wasted but rather the connections and meaningful conversations I can now get out of it. Best of luck and DONT KNOCK IT TILL YOU TRY IT!

by: anony345 4 months, 1 week ago
replying to DoraG

Hi Dora,

Please don’t give up. Please.

I’m less than a week in on my countless attempts to give this stuff up. I don’t look at each relapse as a failure rather an opportunity to gain new insights into just how much of a hinderance addiction can be to living life to the fullest.

There was a point in my life when everything was really falling apart, I wanted to just walk away from everything that I had worked so hard to create. A family member said to me, that alcohol is a depressant, the science actually shows that Ling term use can change our brain chemistry with particular affect on persistent depression. As little as two weeks of abstinence can turn that neurology around for you. He asked, which place do you want to be making an important decision from on these matters?

You are a good person, I can feel it. You wouldn’t be reaching out if you weren’t. Wether you choose to see it or not, there’s some part of you trying to push past this challenge. Please don’t give up.

A little thought for you- I choose not to count days of sobriety (Nor do I have a problem with anyone celebrating the achievement) rather I focus on the fact that alcohol and I are friends that should not play together. I have a certain amount of energy to expend each day and I can use that energy to mourn the loss of my friend or I can use that energy to find meaning and happiness.

I’m very fortunate in that although my addiction has been going on for a long time, the pattern is an easy one to decipher: because I didn’t handle conflict well throughout the day, I’d come home with a tight chest and broken spirit. I thought alcohol was the answer. I won’t bore you with all the details around How I turned this around (happy to share if you’re interested) however, I know that at 1630 each night the monkey is let out of his cage and he’s trying to climb on my back.

The work colleagues drinking, the family members having a sip, social media, television, alcohol is all around us but that’s not the reason for our addiction. It’s the wiring in our brains. Who knows but for some reason we can’t just have a sip or just have one.

Please don’t give up.

I’ll be back here tomorrow to see how you went.


by: Mjacobson73 3 months, 3 weeks ago

Dora I am so glad u are here. when I got sober 4 yrs ago I was literally insane and chasing death. I know that despite what the outside world thinks and does for me to pick up a drink would send me back down that spiral and I probably wouldn't survive. the people I hang out today are my recovery people brought by my higher power. these are the people who know understand me better and accept me for me. I couldn't ask for more. I encourage u to stay with us and find some support in your local AA group. it may not seem like it now but it's truly the best thing to do and your life will only get better

by: Sarad1976 4 months, 1 week ago

Not only is it realistic, but necessary or I will end up in jail or hospital like before. I don’t care what others think so long as I am free.Ive been sober awhile and been to a lot of parties and had a lot of fun rather than embarrassment from drinking too much.

by: Guy 4 months, 1 week ago

Thank you so much everyone! I love this community. There is only support. I will keep at this, a day at a time.

by: DoraG 3 months, 3 weeks ago

Have you tried getting close to Jesus. He can help you with all that stuff. The only way to get thru all this is with Jesus

by: let9222 3 months, 3 weeks ago