I had been smoking crack since about March off and on. Then my friend gave me 2 HUGE icicles of crystal meth. On was 5 grams so almost 10 grams total. And he gave me 2 grams of crack. He's an addict no doubt. I always doubted my addiction bc I never paid for it and always could dibble and dabble and go about my life. But I was a moron to think I could do all the meth and crack without getting addicted. It was November 8th. The day my life fell apart and just struggled to stay afloat since then. My feet swelled up so bad I thought they were going to pop it was so bad. FINALLY so random, an old friend hit me up and explained I need to throw it away. I hit it once in the am Saturday, November 26, 2023. My feel immediately blew up. So I threw it away. I'm definitely feening now. I'm wondering how I'll be able to go about my life without ANY drugs. I'm scared. This is the first time of real sobriety. He said to drop EVERY friend that uses. That leaves nobody. Anyone who can say anything helpful or kind I would appreciate.
Think it is an abrupt change and a difficult change. It may seem like an entire world's shifting and you're leaving so much behind. But it is possible to do and it is also possible to have an enjoyable life without it as well. For one, that monkey on your back is gone, you sleep better, you're less anxious, depressed, you have more energy... etc. It just takes a bit of time and patience to let it get out of your system and to stop thinking about it all the time.
I don't know how many times I watched that movie 28 days. It seemed like an impossible challenge for me to do on my own, but people go through it in rehab. So it was difficult, but did push through it. Had to make peace with the fact that I can no longer drink. Not a sip, there hasn't be 'just one' for me in a very long time, I don't know how to do that anymore. But I would find something else to do at that time, really anything else – just not pick up the first one.
Stay clean today, 'til lunch time, 'til the news time, 'til you go to sleep. Tomorrow is a new day and a different day. Then again you do the same. 'Til you go to sleep. Days add up. It gets easier with time. Join a support group, you meet new people there and it is inspiring to see and talk with people who have managed to get out it, then talk to someone in person who is knowledgeable about it, ask for help, write here how you're feeling, what bothers you, what changes you are noticing... etc. There are many inspiring recovery stories online, I recommend reading them and following their steps where you can :)
Happy that you're here. Wish you the best :)
Love and care about you. Try picking up your phone and posting on this forum instead of a drug if you get a craving. I also need therapy, 12 step meetings. Don't allow yourself to think you can handle another drug no matter what.
The first days are so hard but worth it! Keep your reasons to quit close, keep posting here and the days will add up. I found reading a lot of alcohol memoirs helped me. My fav was the unexpected joy of being sober by Catherine gray
I posted my comment before your whole post came up. I also found the book from Brandon Novak-dreamseller quite good. He writes of living on the streets and using heroin. Definitely made me appreciate I was working on my sobriety reading his book. As for not hanging out certain people that use you’ll find as you get stronger it may not bother you to hang out with certain people or you may just drift apart anyways. Now that I’m not drinking my friend group has changed and some interests and activities too. I definitely feel a stronger connection to loved ones and friends now that I’m not wasted all the time. I am present and can actually feel every moment for what it is . Hope this helps! Wishing you all the strong vibes to kick addictions ass!
Congratulations on your 2nd day of sobriety. This is not an easy battle by any means, but you have made an important first step of realizing you have a problem and quitting. We all struggle from time to time. Go back and read a few of my recent posts and you'll see you are certainly not alone in the struggle.
All we can really do is to stay sober TODAY. Forget about yesterday and tomorrow. One day at a time. You can do it. Anything worth doing is very difficult, and this is no exception. Your friend (the good one) is right about getting away from ALL people that use. I hate to say it, but "friends" that give you drugs to get you addicted aren't friends at all. Misery loves company.
There are people on here that really care about you and your sobriety. They love to see people succeed, and if you should happen to falter, they are also here to offer wisdom and encouragement. I made the mistake of not reaching out to the fine folks here when I really needed to. Thought I could do it all myself. I was wrong.
You can do this.