"It's okay to feel hopeless."
If you suddenly feel hopeless because all you can do is fantasize about using or for any reason, that is OK. The 12 Steps and 12 Traditions Book suggests that hitting bottom is a requirement for change. Hitting bottom does not mean that you have to go to jail or a hospital or turn over your car or something else like that. It simply requires that you admit hopelessness. Hopelessness means that you don't have the answers anymore about why you can't control your drug use or your life. Hopelessness means that you finally know you are lost without an idea of what to do to get better.
Though hopelessness sounds frightening, it is actually a blessing because now you are open to the help you need. You can begin the process of change.
I was able to hit bottom when I was laying on my back staring at the ceiling saying to myself I have no clue of what to do to change. I remember saying that I had no hope. I felt completely empty. But that emptiness gave my Higher Power the room it needed to come in.
If you feel hopeless, that's a good thing for positive change. It is better to admit that you don't know what to do rather than to think that you figured out why you used so that you don't need recovery. Try making a list of consequences due to your use and try to see how you did not want those consequences. This list will help you see how you were out of control. Maybe, it would be a good time to call a local office of AA to find out where there's a meeting. It would be a good time to follow the suggestion of getting to a treatment center for detox. Even going to any emergency room may be appropriate.