When I'm sober I can be a good person, when I'm not sober I have to convince myself I'm a good person.

When I was trapped by my addiction, I would spend hours telling myself that I wasn't so bad, that my misery was really everybody else's doing. I would try to defend my addiction telling myself that school, taxes, my family, and work were unfair and that I really was doing all that I could but everything was just too much to handle. I would try to convince myself and everyone else that I was a good person.

Being clean and sober, I am able to do the next right thing. I am able to pay my bills, be kind to others, live decently. I don't have to defend my ego.  I don't have to convince myself I am good because I am able to do good things.


To-do:

If you are considering relapsing, ask yourself if you want to return to someone who SAYS he is good rather than someone who DOES good.