How I finally started recovery

This story was shared by a SoberTool user on: September 20, 2016

I was "in and out" so many times that I stopped counting. I would sit in an AA meeting and it all sounded like gibberish to me. Finally, one day I listened very intently to "How It Works" and realized that "honesty" appears three times in the first paragraph. I had been anything but honest, even lying, by omission, about my day count. That day I announced to what would become my home group that henceforth I was going to be completely honest. Having said it out loud I felt I was committed to being honest with myself and this group of people. My second milestone was when I decided to becoming "willing." I decided to become willing to find a higher power (I was vehemently anti-god). I looked up the word "spirituality" and found a definition that described it as "being connected." I am connected to nature and to my fellow AAs. And that feeling of connectedness has given me the discipline and willingness to work the steps. I am half-way through my steps and feeling 100 percent better. My old ways were leading me further and further away from happiness and closer and closer to death. I now have four months sober. I attend at least five meetings a week and use SoberTool on my phone daily. If I need to calm down, be inspired or if I'm just standing in line somewhere and feeling bored, I search the app for quick tidbits of knowledge. My head is thick -- I need to constantly remember that I'm an alcoholic and need to focus on my recovery. I need lots of practice and repetition!

 

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To-do:

That's H.O.W.! Keep being Honest, Open-minded and Willing. Thank you for your inspiration!

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